The Paul Davis Technology/Online Safety workshop tonight was really, really well done. He didn't sugar coat the messages he was trying to deliver, and his suggestions, arguments and reasonings were very compelling. For those of you who were unable to attend the workshop, but were interested in learning about what Paul had to say - see below for the summary notes.
INTRODUCTION:
- Always remember, technology is a gift, not an entitlement. There should be RULES, GUIDELINES, AND CONSEQUENCES given with these devices.
- Limit your children's time on devices and be aware of what they are doing on them.
- Take away the privileges of devices/online access (for a meaningful amount of time) if your children do not follow the rules/guidelines, so that they are taught to use devices and the internet appropriately.
Recommendations and Awareness:
- Children under 2 years old should be exposed to 0 hours a day of technology.
- Children between 2-10: maximum 2 hours, per day.
- Technology should never, ever, ever be permitted in a bedroom. This includes devices, and gaming systems. Devices/online access should only be permitted in common living spaces where you can monitor what they are doing and how much time they are really spending on them. (When you go to bed, you should take the devices with you)
- Privacy... does not apply to devices/internet. It is more important to keep your children safe. Young people are naive and unaware of the dangers of the internet, and you need to be aware who your children are communicating with, how they are communicating... and what exactly their curious minds are looking at. Police will confirm, cyberbullying and inappropriate internet use almost always, always, always happens in their bedrooms.
- Children under 2 years old should be exposed to 0 hours a day of technology.
- Children between 2-10: maximum 2 hours, per day.
- Technology should never, ever, ever be permitted in a bedroom. This includes devices, and gaming systems. Devices/online access should only be permitted in common living spaces where you can monitor what they are doing and how much time they are really spending on them. (When you go to bed, you should take the devices with you)
- Privacy... does not apply to devices/internet. It is more important to keep your children safe. Young people are naive and unaware of the dangers of the internet, and you need to be aware who your children are communicating with, how they are communicating... and what exactly their curious minds are looking at. Police will confirm, cyberbullying and inappropriate internet use almost always, always, always happens in their bedrooms.
Alarming Facts:
- 40% of students at our school have facebook, instagram, or snapchat. The minimum age you are "allowed' to have facebook is 13.
- 90% of our students admit to being allowed to have devices in their rooms.
- Children are trusting and often accept "new friends" who indicate they share common interests with them, without actually personally knowing or vetting them them. Paul showed many examples of fake social media accounts he made (impersonating a young person) over the last month, where he asked to "friend" or follow local kids. Hundreds of kids accepted his friend/following requests and a handful followed back.
- By granting your children "privacy" online - you do not actually know what you children are looking at, who they are really communicating with, or who is viewing or storing their photos. - Sickeningly enough, child predators etc, often have hard drives filled with innocent enough photos, that they've sexualized. (for example, dance recital photos, or bathing suit photos etc.)
- Although YouTube does not allow pornography, it does allow sexuality. I'm sure most parents can relate to allowing their kid to watch a kiddie show on YouTube and then overhearing something that doesn't sound right and asking/wondering how they got to THAT. Yes, there are filters etc. but you as a parent need to be the most diligent filter. Note: You can download the YouTube KIDS app, and it is a much better choice for your young kids to watch.
- The average high school student sends 4200 texts a month. This is distracting and time consuming... and is taking away from time they should be sleeping, or studying, or interacting with real people etc.
- Snapchat: Fun, and silly... but the most commonly used app by people, including youth, for sending inappropriate pictures of themselves back and forth. And contrary to misled beliefs, the pictures don't vanish/delete after 10 seconds, etc. Users can retrieve them. Also, It is common to hear children as young as 14 being caught, or admitting to sending sexualized photos of themselves to someone they trust.
- netlingo.com : A helpful resource to stay "in the know" of text lingo you may not be familiar of. For example "wow" is mom upside down - kids will text wow. and really mean. "warning: mom is looking over my shoulder". (those sneaky little...)
- 40% of students at our school have facebook, instagram, or snapchat. The minimum age you are "allowed' to have facebook is 13.
- 90% of our students admit to being allowed to have devices in their rooms.
- Children are trusting and often accept "new friends" who indicate they share common interests with them, without actually personally knowing or vetting them them. Paul showed many examples of fake social media accounts he made (impersonating a young person) over the last month, where he asked to "friend" or follow local kids. Hundreds of kids accepted his friend/following requests and a handful followed back.
- By granting your children "privacy" online - you do not actually know what you children are looking at, who they are really communicating with, or who is viewing or storing their photos. - Sickeningly enough, child predators etc, often have hard drives filled with innocent enough photos, that they've sexualized. (for example, dance recital photos, or bathing suit photos etc.)
- Although YouTube does not allow pornography, it does allow sexuality. I'm sure most parents can relate to allowing their kid to watch a kiddie show on YouTube and then overhearing something that doesn't sound right and asking/wondering how they got to THAT. Yes, there are filters etc. but you as a parent need to be the most diligent filter. Note: You can download the YouTube KIDS app, and it is a much better choice for your young kids to watch.
- The average high school student sends 4200 texts a month. This is distracting and time consuming... and is taking away from time they should be sleeping, or studying, or interacting with real people etc.
- Snapchat: Fun, and silly... but the most commonly used app by people, including youth, for sending inappropriate pictures of themselves back and forth. And contrary to misled beliefs, the pictures don't vanish/delete after 10 seconds, etc. Users can retrieve them. Also, It is common to hear children as young as 14 being caught, or admitting to sending sexualized photos of themselves to someone they trust.
- netlingo.com : A helpful resource to stay "in the know" of text lingo you may not be familiar of. For example "wow" is mom upside down - kids will text wow. and really mean. "warning: mom is looking over my shoulder". (those sneaky little...)
CYBERBULLYING TIPS:
- Students: Do not engage. Do not banter back and forth. Teach your children to just.stop. Teach them to take screenshots etc. to document it and of course, to come to you.
- PARENTS: Never react immediately. And NEVER engage the child cyberbullying. (You will get charged for uttering threats if you get barky) Do not immediately contact their parents. Chances are, you will be charged up, and they will naturally immediately become defensive, and it will escalate. Take screen shots, collect evidence rationally. Cool off. Go to bed and approach it from a more rational place the following day.
- Paul did note: If your children are under 13 and being cyberbullied... they should not even be on social media networking sites yet. Although it's horrible they are being picked on, if this is the case, you've allowed them to be put in the position in the first place. Over and over he reiterated that ultimately, parents need to start taking more steps to protect their children proactively, versus reactively. Age restrictions for social media sites, and no technology in the bedrooms are the greatest safeguards you can put in place.
- 12 years, plus 1 day is the minimum age your child can be charged for cyberbullying if they are engaging in such crimes. It is a serious offence.
- Minors caught sending and spreading inappropriate photos of themselves, or others can be charged with distributing child pornography.
RANDOM TAKE AWAYS:
- Paul highly suggested purchasing an app enabled router. With it you can set time restrictions for particular apps. (and never again hear "just one more minute!")
- Do not give your children the wifi passwords - plug it in yourself. One so you can monitor their online usage, and set the tone that they are not entitled to the internet. Also, by not having the wifi password, they also cannot give it to their friends. (Anything "bad" they do while on your internet - it will come back on you.)
- Gaming: Call of Duty/Grand Theft Auto etc. - MOMS: BE AWARE OF THE CONTENT OF THESE GAMES. It is typically the dad's buying/playing them with their kids... The content is extremely mature and inappropriate for children. They are rated 18+ for a reason. They are not just about car races, and hiding from the cops... Just observe the content of these games, and consider if you actually approve of your youth playing them.
- He suggests passwords be 12 characters or longer, every site having a different password (write all 10K of them in a book)
- Remove your birthdate, anniversary and where you went to highschool from your social media accounts. Your close friends already know this information.
- Post where you've been and what you've done versus where you are and what you're doing. (Do not announce you're going to Mexico and leaving your house open to be broken into etc.)
- Back up and delete content off your devices once per week.
- Make your phone passwords 7 characters or longer. (A stolen phone has so much personal information on it - very easy for identity theft)
- Enable location finder on your phone, but disable apps from date/place stamping posts and pictures.
- Paul does not recommend having facebook, snap chat or instagram on your phones - they are very privacy invasive. Put them on other devices if you can.
